I don't want to go all "Mother Teresa" on this, but it feels at times like the patient takes on the role of the consoler - a bit of a role reversal. It's not a burden for me, it's more like an extension of my job on the team: as Morale Officer.
Cancer is scary, and as the patient, i’ve had a little bit of time to process the news, understand some of the science, and maybe begin to wrap my brain around what is happening. but To a family member, friend or even acquaintance, they’re coming into my story somewhat in the middle - so the entrance can be a bit jarring. Additionally, any cancer baggage they may be carrying (previous experiences, too many bad TV movies, or other unsupported information), can only further color their perspective. Those distractions make it harder for them to connect with me, at a time when all I’m really looking for is the same rapport and interplay that we shared before my diagnosis – a normal interaction based on a past history.
Folks: it’s ok to be scared (I’m scared, too), but it’s also ok to be normal, because I want things to be as normal as possible, too – in the midst of total chaos. It’s within our power to make it so. Laugh with me. Cry with me. Hate on me. ignore me. Whatever it was before . . . it's ok to keep on keepin' on.
