In the last almost three years, I've taken more medications than I can count or recollect. But one thing that they all had in common was the lengthy litany of legalese that was included (PI-Package Insert and ISI-Important Safety Information). No doubt you would have understandably ignored and/or tossed out the multi-folded blur of infinitesimal black ink seemingly printed on some medium just slightly thicker than that 1-ply toilet paper they have in public restrooms. But if you had taken the time to read the "fine print" (which all end with a secret formula for curing insomnia - "read this in its entirety") you would have seen a significant section of barely comprehensible, ass-covering, anything-is-possible, side effects warnings. They range from the life-threatening (Black Box) to the totally innocuous (if you are allergic to this medicine - don't take it; duh!). Don't get me wrong, I appreciate the heads up, but after awhile they all seem to be the same list of so many possible maladies that it's hard to take them seriously. Sort of like a medical version of The Boy Who Cried Wolf.
So I started getting a stuffy nose and head around the same time that I was beginning my new chemo maintenance regimen, and I gave it little thought. Maybe it's the onset of a cold (I get those pretty easily now). So I began dosing with Day/NightQuil and trying to beat it back the OTC way. My blood pressure shot up, as detected in a weekly clinic visit, and upon consultation with Dr S, it turns out that The Quils raise your BP. I stopped immediately, but the stuff and stuffiness continued. Too long for a cold, must be a sinus infection I thought. Couple more weeks of my schnoz running like a faucet, and I concluded that it wasn't a sinus infection either. Allergies - you idiot, it's pollen season !? you might rightfully be screaming at your screen by now. But I take a daily Sam's Club version of Allegra, so that's not the culprit either. And then it hits me like the proverbial ton of bricks: look at the side effects dummy. So I check the SE's for my chemo (Velcade) and sure enough, there it is, down near the bottom of the list of about 95 things, just after toe nails falling off and before diarrhea or constipation (make up your mind, which is it - talk about covering your bases) - stuffy nose. Stuffy nose !?!? Are you freaking kidding me?!?!
It is well documented how lucky I have been avoiding the common side effects like nausea, dizziness, loss of appetite, weakness, blurred vision, muscle pain, hair loss (except during my stem cell transplant), etc. And then it sneaks up on me like a thief in the night, creeping up behind me all stealth and unsuspecting - stuffing my head like a Teddy Bear. So now I know. And since my most recent switch from Velcade to Empliciti, the fuzziness in my head has subsided a bit, though it peaks the day after a Saturday treatment, and takes a few days to clear. If this is the worst I have to deal with - so be it. And now that I have been able to secure a fresh supply of soft and absorbent paper dinner napkins online - I'm good to go (good to blow).
